all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Randomize
