Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
