escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
