Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
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