GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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