Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
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