Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Randomize