Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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