happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
