'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
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