Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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