how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
You need a sexual gate keeper
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
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