i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
