It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
