idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
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