You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I will die if light touches me.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
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