its not stalking. its research.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
smell my finger.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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