That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
