do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize