One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
