i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
He shit in the fireplace
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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