I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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