Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
ok first of all what the fuck
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
