If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
