Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
The air taste purple.
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