then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Randomize
