wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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