Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Randomize