you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Also, beer. Big fan.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Randomize
