I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
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