Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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