Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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