tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rumble strips road head = magical
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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