Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize