I want to make a zoo with you.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Randomize