I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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