I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
