Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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