last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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