just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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