i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Randomize
