Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Terrible idea I love it
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Randomize