i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
