her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
I can't turn off my feet"
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
