Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
