you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
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