We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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