STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
He felt like a one man threesome
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
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