so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
Randomize
