we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
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